Irritation central
Lord, I'm irritated today. Everything, and everyone, is setting me off. Last night was actually an okay night, and we had a pretty good morning. But I made a COLOSSAL mistake that I ended up paying for, for the rest of the day.
I've been desperately trying to get my baby to nap better. Some days he's fantastic, other days it's a crap shoot. The last few days have been pretty good. His pattern seems to be one longer nap, and one shorter nap, and then a cat nap in the late afternoon. I wish I could get him on two long naps, but I figure that'll come. Monday mornings we normally go to a play group, which is a great way for us to a) get out of the house, b) allow the toddler to burn off some energy and c) for me to connect with some friends. Well, today I decided we'd forgo the play group in favour of getting the baby to have a decent nap. BIG MISTAKE. Okay, maybe not that big, because he DID have a good nap. But the toddler was so rammy all day. The afternoon brought short naps for everyone and about 10 minutes of alone time for me.
Enter rage city.
I'm not mad at the kids....I'm just mad. I feel totally exhausted and totally defeated today. And before you comment, this has nothing to do with food. I ate really well today and am REALLY full! I had good, well-planned meals and was very prepared. Dinner was a tad delayed due to an oversight on my part, but it was okay...I wasn't starving.
I managed to watch Oprah today and organizational guru Peter Walsh was on. I have a pretty big crush on him. I would pay any amount of money if I could get him to my house.
Here is the root of my rage. My house is a disaster. Some of the mess is hidden where no one can see (the basement). Some of it is right out in the open (the family room). The toys all over the place are driving me insane. The clutter is driving me insane. The fact that I have zero organization in my life is driving me insane.
And I'm overwhelmed.
This detox is about more than just food for me. All of this is wrapped up in one big huge issue. The state of my home has led to the mess of my body. The mess of my body lets me hide behind the fact that I can't deal with the mess of my house. And I feel totally alone.
I'm dealing with one thing at a time, which is the best way to tackle this I think. If I can get a handle on my weight, energy and health, then I can tackle the REAL problem.
When you come over, please don't judge me. And consider yourself warned.
posted by Shannon @ 5:28 PM
3 Comments
3 Comments:
LMAO...not at you Shannon, but your warning! Let me tell ya sista, I feel your pain! In fact I am sitting here staring at all our dinner dishes sitting on the counter right now. Not to mention half of the junk drawer sitting on the counter because connor decided to empty half of it while helping me today! There is clutter everywhere and it drives me insane! YOU ARE NOT ALONE!! Really! Clutter is the root of much of my anger!
Honey - you are so not alone. Just as I have one thing cleaned up my little Hurricane destroys something else let alone get into the root of the junk. Let me give you an example, I have been particularly OCD about dishes lately as we have only one sink and it feels like it is constantly full. It is also the only thing I feel like I have control over lately. Last night instead of making myself clean up the kitchen at 8 p.m. I left it in a disasterous state and went to bed. I was exhausted, had a big headache and figured I would be up with Sophie at some point last night as she has been up the past 3 nights (molars and eye teeth). When I got up this morning it was the last thing I wanted to see, but once I got breakie settled and my coffee was made - I tackled it. Then I tackled some laundry. The third thing I really wanted to do today was have a shower so I made sure the Hurricane couldn't hurt herself and did it. The way I look at it - to get the big things done around the house that I want to - and the list is long - is my husband either needs to take the Hurricane off my hands for the day, she goes to Grandma's or they come here or I hire a babysitter to occupy her for a couple of hours while I get something done. I don't make long list of what I need to do, as it is pretty much memorized in my head. I make short manageable lists of things - like today's - clean up the kitchen, make my juice for the next couple of days, do one load of laundry and have a shower. Small steps!! Hey you can always send Ethan over here for a playdate for a few hours if there is something you need to get done! He is more than welcome to come and steal Sopie's toys from her ;)
sweet jesus, don't offer that or I'll be sending him over PRONTO.
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